Stress Test

I LOVE a good test on FaceBook just about as much as I loved magazine tests or personality tests or spelling tests. I like tests! Usually these tests don't prove much. Besides the fact I have stellar spelling skills, I mostly get the info, take it in and then move on. But today's test...right on time!

Last week I went to lunch with my friend and she asked a rare question. After we exchanged the usual pleasantries, "How are you? No how are you?", she asked, "how are your stress levels?". I tried to cover, "Girl I'm straight." But as I sat with the question, I realized I'm EXTREMELY stressed out these days. Now in general or compared to the average person, my stress levels are super high. As a young girl, I remember being stressed over being good enough. In school, I stressed over grades. Since I've entered the workforce, I've always secured jobs that came with a lot of pressure to get things done. We all live in stressful times. Have you seen the news lately? Or paid rent? Or tried to change your life situation? All those things bring me stress.

That constant stress sends everything to the land of discontent. Here's an example of how it goes: I'll pray for something. It'll appear. I'll be excited because I see something I visualized in the flesh. Then I'll begin to think of what I'll need to keep said thing. Then I get worked up and stressed out. All this before I even enjoy the thing. It SUCKS. My biggest trigger for stress is change. Since February 17, my life has been constantly evolving. I've lost people close to me as they have transitioned from this Earth plane. I left my long time job position, which while stressful, it was very consistent (same desk, same office, same people, same payday). I went back home for a job but didn't have my own place and stayed on friends's sofas for a month. I came back to L.A. and now work in a very different way than I ever have. Few things in my life have remained the same and I am STRESSED OUT.

The conversation with my friend encouraged me to really take a look at my stress. The worst part of my closer look is that I often seek stress. I have developed a relationship with stress. It's like when abused folk love their abuser. I know stress is bad for me but I find I seek it. When everything is super calm, I get anxious and feel like I'm not doing enough with my life or in the world. When I work, I automatically go into super human machine mode. I even turn home cleaning projects into huge, stress-filled productions. I've got to find a way to let stress go. And then comes the wisdom of a FaceBook test.

When I take my time with things and people I enjoy, I feel the stress fade. When my prayer and meditation life are right, I don't stress as much. When I lose myself in a great book, movie or tv show, I don't feel stress. Basically, the test was right. Stress brings discontent but the things I enjoy bring contentment.

Afterall, the scientists behind FaceBook tests say so!